Vice Commander of the Chidori Space Pirates' Second Division,
Diamond Princess Mutsu.
You were a space pirate?!
Long time no see, Con—
I've made up my mind.
This ship now belongs to Sakamoto Tatsuma!
I'll buy this ship, slaves and all.
Thank you so very much, Captain.
You're truly kind.
Give and take.
That's what business is all about.
Tomorrow, at Planet Ken'o, we shall execute all the slaves,
along with that girl.
Tell her it was delicious.
Sakamoto Tatsuma's request: Watch this program in a nice 'n' bright room and at a safe distance from your TV!!
Even I couldn't say why I did what I did back then.
Perhaps I didn't want to get others caught up in my own battles,
or perhaps I wanted to atone for all the slaves I'd sold up until then.
No, most likely...
the daughter of a pirate just wanted to take part in a real trade at the very end.
Always Leave Enough Room for Pebbles in Your Bag
Put out the fire!
And? This is what your "real trade" resulted in?
Looks like you got some pretty hefty change back.
Yeah, droppin' all these coins is most unbecomin' of a trader.
Y-You bastards!
I'd better collect 'em all this time.
Right down to the very last yen.
Where's that moron?
They might've realized their bluff didn't work
and decided to try to take him and escape.
You search the deck.
Got it.
Wait, Muts—
Why, you little...
Welcome home, Vice Commander.
How nice of you to finally come back to us.
Let's pick up...
where we left off that time.
That's a pirate's daughter for you.
You're putting on a brave face right to the very end.
Or so I'd like to say,
but it seems you saw this coming.
Everybody knows pirates don't get to die painless deaths.
And I can see the very next cut,
where your face will be hit by bird poop, coming from a mile away.
Not again!
And the seagulls on this planet drop huge turds!
You're saying you were prepared to die at any time?
It won't come off...
Then why did you stay on this ship?
Was it for him, perhaps?
Why didn't you run?
The same reason you didn't.
You alone weren't enough bait
to ensure everyone could get away.
You...
By playing the decoy yourselves, you tried to distract us
and buy enough time for the slaves to get away.
Mutsu-sama, this is undeniably a rebellion.
Now I can freely order your execution.
26.477
And theirs, as well.
How's it look?
Targets sighted 50 km south of this ship.
We just shot them down.
The slaves are now sleeping with the fishes.
Yes, it was just the same back then.
You tried to protect your friends,
but were unable to do anything
and simply fell to the ground.
And here you both are again,
fallen on the ground.
People never change, eh?
Yeah, they don't.
Just like your stupid face.
Oh, sorry.
I forgot I've never seen your face.
Let me tell you this, Con Man!
The one thing we wanted to take back from you most
was that girl's life!
If she hadn't escaped back then,
if I'd been the one at the helm,
I could've gotten the crumbling Chidori back on its feet!
But this traitor ruined everything!
Commander!
You were the ones who tossed her away, twice, like a pebble.
I'm a trader.
So long as I get paid, I'll gladly sell you anythin', be it ships or bags.
But no matter how large your offer,
I have nothin' to sell to scum
who don't understand the value of those pebbles we call comrades.
Could you please leave, good sir?
Y-You bastard!
People don't change, huh? Well said.
You haven't changed a bit since then, either.
Too bad.
None of what you did affected my plans in any way whatsoever.
Now, if you'll sink to the depths of the ocean, all will be as I planned.
Business is no walk in the park, huh?
In the end, all I did was take.
I couldn't give them anything in return.
Nah. Your pebble was a wonderful product.
That was good business.
That was nothing but a pebble.
All goods are worth nothin' 'til they're on a store shelf.
Traders are alchemists who derive value from nothin' to turn a profit.
That you discovered that value makes you a proper trader.
And now, it's my turn.
Didn't I tell you that I'd buy this ship, slaves and all?
I never planned on leaving anyone locked inside a cage.
Including you, Mutsu.
You're no longer a pirate,
nor a mere pebble.
You're a diamond I found in the rough,
a gem known as a comrade!
Y-You fiends!
We played dead and disguised ourselves among your men.
I can't believe you fell for it twice.
You really aren't cut out to be a captain.
One moronic captain is more than enough.
Fire!
Attention all pirates!
C-Commander! The slave ships!
We have taken over your fleet!
Hand over the mother ship, too,
How did they...
and free all the slaves!
You have five minutes.
One...
Two...
Three...
Y-You bastards!
Four...
Five...
Gran?!
That was too quick! Didn't you hear me say "five minutes"?!
When you get old, time seems to fly by so much faster.
No, it really has only been five seconds!
They fired at us!
Curses! Ignore the firing and turn the tables on the slaves!
C-Commander! They've vanished!
What?
Hup.
W-Wait.
That fighting style,
pale skin,
and braided hat to ward off the sun...
Don't tell me...
You're a Yato?!
So the heiress of a space pirate fleet
is also a member of the universe's mightiest warrior race?!
Where does that leave our heroine?!
Damn it, Tatsuma!
You couldn't have picked a more dangerous XO if you'd tried!
Yato? What's that all about?
You didn't know?!
Fire!
Hold them off!
Are they trying to escape?
Not on my watch.
You're not the only ones who can use projectiles!
Commander! All the guns have been destroyed!
I don't care! Get going!
Don't you understand that I'm tellin' you to wait?
You forgot your change, sir.
M-Mutsu...
With that much power and talent,
you could've become a notorious pirate.
Why are you still serving that man?
Why do you remain a mere trader?
To repay your debt to him?
To atone for the slaves?
Nonsense.
Even if I wanted to repay my debts,
or atone for my sins,
they're all gone.
That insane trader took all my debts and sins from me.
I stand before you as someone who lost everything she had.
As plain old Mutsu.
As Vice Captain of the Kaientai, Mutsu.
Those are the slaves from back then!
Don't tell me your Kaientai is...
Remember this.
I'm not a pebble that moron picked up.
The one who found a pile of gems back then
was me.
What's this?
Here I thought I'd finally get to see your face,
but it's as filthy as ever.
It ain't gonna sell.
Mutsu-sama! I'm so glad you're safe!
I knew you'd be able to pull it off.
You even managed to buy a ship with those unprofitable bags.
Give it back! Give our ship back!
Your business acumen is truly beyond measure, Mutsu-sama.
Let's celebrate Mutsu-sama's safe return with a party!
Hey! Doesn't anybody want to celebrate the captain's safe return?!
Well, you didn't return safe and sound.
Your mug's gone bon voyage.
Still, I'm amazed your Kaientai fleet
is made up of the slaves you freed.
This is a trade, too.
The slaves have nowhere to go, so I give them a home as members of my crew.
In return, it saves me labor costs.
It's a win-win.
I'll leave it at that,
because I'm sure you'd rather drop dead than say you did it for a girl.
You'll have to compensate me for my services.
I'm running a business, too.
I'll leave it at that,
because I'm sure you'd rather drop dead than say you did it for a girl, too.
You said I was no longer a pirate, didn't you?
How so?
This is clearly worse than piracy.
Don't sweat the small stuff.
Pirates and traders do more or less the same things.
We eat, poop, sleep, and puke.
You're the only one who pukes anywhere and everywhere.
Besides, you already know the difference between pirates and traders.
That's right.
We Kaientai are pirates who live for pleasure.
Kai-rates
We're Kai-rates!
We're good to go.
Kaientai...
...lift off!
Odd Jobs Gin-chan
Gin-san, Gin-san, we've received a package from Mutsu-san.
What? Is it my reward?
The Razor XO really knows where it's at!
Look, Gin-chan!
It's 50 million yen!
For real?!
Or, well, a bag with room for 50 million,
filled with pickled radishes!
That was good business.
With those words, the woman filled her pockets with pebbles
and set sail across the sea of stars.
Odd Jobs Gin-chan
Wait, what?
We ended up with some time left over.
Don't say it like that!
I was irritated that characters who usually only show up in the OP and ED
got a two-episode arc that ended on a nice note, so I'm glad this happened.
What do you mean, she's actually a Yato? That's news to me.
Well, there have been ups and downs,
but Gintama Season Three, which began with an apology press conference,
has now managed to stay on air for a whole two cours.
Seriously, so much has happened.
We played basketball and wore the Cloths.
We really did our best to ride on others' coattails.
Uh, well...
And now,
thanks to all of you, it's been decided that we'll be airing a third cours, too!
Oh...
'Kay.
Hey, what's with the lame reactions?
Everyone probably already found out we're continuing from anime magazines
or TV Tokyo's official site.
And considering we'll have to make do with a shoestring budget,
it's a double-edged sword.
Hey! What's with this mood?!
Act more excited, even if you have to force yourselves!
But well,
it was really difficult to make a return this time.
I mean, the manga staff used Jump's cover to tell us, "Don't do it!"
And the filthy grown-ups went all,
"This will set a bad example, so you represent all the anime staff and apologize."
To top it all off, they said,
"Your hair's all crooked. Show some sincerity,"
and nearly made me shave my head there.
I somehow convinced them to let me off with a 7:3 part!
Any adult who'd associate with this anime can't be a decent person.
Yeah, we did suddenly go from a Sunrise production
to being produced by Bandai Namco *ictures.
Uh, was that really the company's name?
Bandai Namco *ictures is just Bandai Namco *ictures.
Oh, would abbreviating it to BN* be easier to say?
I'm saying there's no beep there!
I mean, it's just a P!
When you're running a company,
there are some things you just gotta hide from the public.
What's the point of hiding the company's name?!
That aside, what do we do about the remaining airtime?
Oh, maybe run a recap or something?
The higher-ups said to make it seem a little special,
because if we did a normal recap,
we'd look like all those other shows delayed by production issues.
Man, that's such a pain in the ass.
Uh, in that case,
how about the three of us describe all that's happened so far as we reflect on it?
But if it's just the three of us, won't it all be the same stuff?
We could make it seem special by having three special guests.
How about something like this?
Third Cours Confirmed Celebration Project
Our Recap
Our Recap.
Our guests today:
Sakata Gintoki
Sakata Gintoki-san,
Sakata Gintoki (F)
Sakata Gintoki-san,
Sakata Gintoki (Hijikata)
and Sakata Gintoki-san.
Hold it right there!
What the hell is this?
Guests, my foot!
They're all me!
How are we all coexisting at the same time?!
Oh, shut it.
Because there's demand for us, obviously.
Screw that! Your demand is my demand!
Who are you, Gian?
You despicable scum!
Um, you're me, you know!
I'm not you on the inside.
Don't get the wrong idea.
And you, get out of my body already!
Hey, President. Whatcha think of this dude's attitude?
I don't remember allying with you, either.
Crazy bitch.
Say what?!
Don't get all cocky using my body, damn Mayopiggy-X!
Who are you calling Mayopiggy-X?!
Also, what's with that hairdo?
Trying to act cool?
Even though your real body has V-shaped bangs?
Is it because of the V-shaped bangs?
Because you want to be freed of the V-shaped curse?
Like hell, dumbass!
I can set my hair in my real body if I try, too!
I can get a makeover at any time!
Stop it, you two!
This is making me feel really awkward, so stop!
I can't do this anymore!
Cut, cut! Let's start over!
Odd Jobs Gin-chan
What was that for, Gin-chan?
That seemed really special, you know.
We don't need special if it's going to be so out of control!
We're not after something on the level of Christmas
and New Year's coming at the same time!
Just a little bit is fine!
A three-day weekend is fine!
A three-day weekend, huh?
Third Cours Confirmed Celebration Project
Our Recap
Our Recap.
Our guests today:
Ga*a
Ga*a-san,
O*tega
O*tega-san,
Ma*h
and Ma*h-san.
Hold it!
Cut, cut!
Odd Jobs Gin-chan
I said three-day, not Tri-Stars!
Though I should've seen it coming!
That joke was in SD Gundam already, as the Black Tri-Defeats or something!
By taking a step back,
it's actually become easier to mess with this.
I wanna ask them what the story is behind the move from Sunrise to BN*.
Those guys know what happened?!
I guess they wouldn't.
How about this, then?
Third Cours Confirmed Celebration Project
Our Recap
Our Recap.
Our guests today:
Sadaharu
Sadaharu-san,
Dozaemon
Dozaemon-san,
Hideyoshi (Gorilla)
and Hideyoshi-san.
I have no idea what they're saying!
And couldn't you talk like a human being before?!
Odd Jobs Gin-chan
I thought a pet special would be soothing.
It's not! It's nothing but unsettling!
Uh, I'm sorry,
but while we were messing around, we ended up with less than 30 seconds remaining!
Seriously?!
Forget about the project now. Let's just flash back to everything in one go!
Odd Jobs Gin-chan
On that note...
Please look forward to the third cours!
Style Goes Out of Fashion the Moment It's Put Into Words There Are Two Types of People In This World: Those Who Yell Out Their Attack Names, and Those Who Don't
Next episode, we have Style and Ultimate Attacks.
Yeahhhh!
Next episode is a two-parter featuring Shinpachi for some reason,
so we're flashing back to his scenes in one go.
His retorts are so good, we'd like them echoing in the mountains at night.
Oh, and there'll be a new OP and ED! Yeahhhh!